Have you ever got up in the morning with the best frugal intentions, then by night time you find yourself looking at an order confirmation email wondering how you ended up browsing for window boxes or signature scents in the first place?

You have just been caught out by ego depletion and you are not alone. Ego depletion is the term for the way your willpower gets drained through the day by the effort it takes to meet the challenges we face. Every time we face a challenge or temptation we have to decide whether to take the option with the best long term outcome or the one with immediate rewards and these are often not the same option. research ahs indicated that willpower is like a muscle and as you use it through the day, it gets tired.

Basically, you can only be patient, tolerant and self-denying for so long before you run out of willpower and do something that feels good in the moment and damn the consequences. That might be snapping at a co-worker, eating a grab bag of Hula Hoops or treating yourself to some fancy new underpants from that store that always emails you.

Let’s face it life sucks sometimes and growing more willpower just because we want to isn’t really an option, so how can we make the best use of the willpower we have?

Get rid of minor irritants

Wherever possible:

• Cut out scratchy labels and donate or sell stiff, itchy or tight clothing and shoes that pinch;

• Learn about your devices’ settings so you can customise them for your personal preferences;

• If there are tools or pieces of equipment you use often, make sure it’s the best quality you can afford, so you’re not frustrated by bad design or shoddy construction;

• Ask colleagues, family members, friends and neighbours to change habits they may have that annoy you, it’s possible to have these conversations tactfully and still ask clearly for what you want;

• Consider noise-cancelling headphones for times when you need to focus;

• Keep your environment at a comfortable temperature, clean, pleasant smelling and uncluttered.

Generally pay attention to low-level irritants that drain your willpower without you even really noticing. The more of these you’re putting up with, the less willpower you have for making positive choices when faced with temptations.

Look after your health

Physical and mental discomfort from poor health is something that drains willpower

• Do what you can to get enough sleep;

• Eat well so you’re not hungry, sugar-crashing or suffering from indigestion.;

• Move your body and stretch often, so you don’t end up stiff and cramped;

• Ensure your work environment is as well-designed and ergonomic as possible, so you’re not straining to complete tasks;

• Don’t overdo the screen time and stay away from social media drama;

• Find ways to relax, ideally somewhere quiet in nature, and take a few deep breaths.

Treat yourself (in moderation)

Pre-emptively doing small, nice things for yourself will help you to replenish your willpower and avoid the need to vent, binge or splurge. This is why no spending plan should completely exclude treats. You know what treats look like for you, make sure you have a supply to keep you going, so you don’t feel deprived.

Celebrate your wins (including times when you successfully exercise willpower). Giving yourself a pat on the back is an immediate reward and takes the edge off the pain of delaying gratification.

Finally, forgive yourself. If you are fighting the willpower war on too many fronts and lose a particular battle, don’t get too down. Instead think whether you’d be better served easing up on one or two areas and focusing your efforts elsewhere. Nobody’s perfect and a constant feeling of failure is a drag on willpower too. If your focus is your finances, just keep everything else ticking over for now. Once you’ have your money in better shape, you can choose a new goal elsewhere.

If you want to hear more about ego depletion and the science behind it, listen to this episode of my podcast Squanderlust: Episode 3. Willpower Outage.